So autumn is upon us; an annual arrival of unrivalled beauty when the leaves on the trees turn all hues of yellow, brown and red, the nights rapidly draw in and the air becomes heady with the scent of sweet smoke and seasonal shift. It’s invocative of so many things – playing conquers in the park, that song from Jeff Wayne’s War of the Worlds and, of course, the finality of all things as the year marches inexorably, inevitably, remorselessly and relentlessly towards death.
Yes, all things must pass. Even you. But don’t get all gloomy about it for, coming soon, there’s an app for that!
This is iFuneral, an app that puts you in command when you croak and ensures all your last wishes are followed to the hilt, even if you have chosen some God-awful Whitney Houston warbler to accompany your final vanishing act.
Free to download, after entering personal details, next of kin and/or friends who you wish to notify of your demise demands, the app guides the user to the wishes section where you’ve pre-stated your religion, opted for burial or cremation, chosen your flowers and music, selected a coffin style, specified cortege arrangements and even the clothes you want to wear/want other people to wear for the ceremony, plus legal arrangements and preferred funeral directors.
Nathaniel Kurt, moribund developer of iFuneral, explains: “I suffered bereavement of partners and close friends at a very young age. In most cases I had no idea what kind of funeral they wanted. This led to a terrible dilemma where I didn’t even know if they’d chosen burial or cremation. I know what a trying and upsetting time this can be.”
So, at last, it seems the only thing you can’t control after you pop off is the content of your eulogies. But then, if they’re not up to scratch you can always come back and hound the writer/readers to their own early graves with a damn good haunting!
Head back here for the link on launch day and, hopefully, not a full review to follow…